With fried potato pancakes, jelly donuts, and briscuit, the perfect gift is high cholesterol medication.
(Steve Weiss)
I could tell you, but the whole kibbutz is so verklempt about it, it would make you plotz
(Major Tom)
They vary the spelling every year just to confuse the goyim.
(hog ignorant)
Chanukkah - "Alex - can I buy another vowel, please?"
(Sue & The Bad Dogs)
It was originally only 5 days... but with the shrewd Jewish business tactics, they managed to get a few more outta them!
(darthgator - Happy Hanukkah!)
Everyone's heard of Santa, but only a select few are permitted to learn the sacred rites of the Chanukkah Elf.
(hog ignorant)
All dreidel games are secretly controlled by the Mafia.
(Stacia, Queen of the Weirdos)
The eight Knights of Chanukkah really refers to Arthur, Lancelot, and a half dozen other Brits.
(AckThwap)
The Menorah and Dredel combine to form the UltraMega ThunderZord
(Boneless Boy)
The holiday was originally planned to be called "Decemberfest" but the rabbi doing the announcement sneezed.
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