direct from . . .
Top Ten Things You Should Not Do in the Event of a Fire
(submitted by TheDon)
Check if the TIVO is set -- I hate missing an epidsode of Law and Order.
If the smoke rises too much, don't crawl on the floor. That's how you get carpet burn.
Chant "The roof, the roof, the roof is on fire."
Run back inside in an attempt to save the frozen foods from defrosting.
Put it out with your girlfriend.
Kill the anoying dog next door. Sure, the excuse 'Everything was so crazy.' makes sense right now, but later you won't be able to explaing going back to the fire to get your hachet.
Don your chili pepper costume and sing your best rendition of "Hot! Hot! Hot!"
Take a deep, cleansing breath. Just calm down. Repeat until calm.
Ask the 911 operator if the firemen can bring the marshmallow and hot dogs when they come.
Approach your traumatized neighbor and say, "Hey, that reminds me. You want to come to my BBQ on Sunday?"
(Baby Hates Bunnies)
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Last modified: Feb 13, 2006