direct from . . .
Top Ten Features of the New Microsoft Windows Vista
(submitted by Kris L. Duke #795 in VA Beach)
Instead of running slower when you run multiple programs, it instead becomes detatched, listless.
3 million new and exciting systems bugs including one that causes your computer to start vibrating like tickle me elmo.
(Morgan the seer)
A little Gatesbot pops up every ten minutes to tell you how smart you were to upgrade.
USB-controlled punching bag
Accompanies every unmotivated crash with a catchy jingle
New and improved "Blue Screen of Death"... in 3-D
If it detects you humming a copyrighted tune it charges your bank account a small royalty.
You can take your files with you using the exciting "print" feature.
Automatically curses itself whenever appropriate
Crash manager: make it seem like crashing's not really an accident
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Last modified: Feb 12, 2007