direct from . . .
Top Ten Signs You Won't Be Getting A Tax Rebate
(submitted by The Frunkus Kid)
You just realized you can't list your clingy Facebook friends as dependents.
Insulating your walls with baby seal pelts is not considered an Energy Efficiency Upgrade.
You threaten the IRS that they'll be in a fight with a warlock otherwise.
(Good Ol' Horseface)
You were afraid to find out you owed taxes, so you decided to not fill out any paperwork just in case.
Apparently the rats in your house don't qualify as "dependents".
You lost your job at Chuck-E-Cheese a week into last year, and you are still waiting for that paycheck.
IRS still refuses to let you write off an ivory backscratcher as a 'medical expense'.
You declared all of your narcotics-related income.
Your primary source of income for the year was from running a "humourous" website.
In retrospect hiring Charlie Sheen as a tax advisor might not have been your best move.
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Last modified: Apr 7, 2011