direct from . . .
Top Ten New Years Resolutions You've Already Broken
(submitted by finlero)
Stop eating babies.
Not to wake up in a jail cell on New Years morning, again.
To find a winning lottery ticket along the side of the road by January 9th.
Quit typing your love letters in ComicSansMS.
Avoid creepy, online jokes which make oddly specific references to whatever it is you're doing. Yeah, I'm talking to you.
Stop making my roommate feel like an outcast just because he kills people and eats their hands.
I'll bet you ten dollars I can give up gambling.
Stop wasting time on frivolous internet sites
Stop kissing up to those brilliant Top Ten hosts, Christian and Scott.
Try to be less f *@#*g angry.
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Last modified: Jan 13, 2011