direct from . . .
Top Ten Ways To Tell Your Olympic Training Isn't Going Too Well
(submitted by The Frunkus Kid)
It's been 3 months of payments and you still can't swim.
(Good Ol' Horseface)
You've eaten 1,037 cans of spinach and have yet to see that Popeye effect kick in.
(Stephen "Wimpy" H.)
Your coach insisted on using a "real man's" starting pistol and your gunshot wound isn't healing as quickly as hoped.
Playing Wii absolutely did NOT prepare you for the Down Hill Ski Jump.
Good news: You can long-jump 37 feet. Bad news: You didn't realize it all had to be in one jump.
Your major sponsor is the Mullen sisters, ages 9 and 7, and their lemonade stand.
Some guy in a really long hoodie and a scythe is scouting your training sessions.
You just discovered the Shot Put involves THROWING that iron ball, not just "putting it there."
Timothy still has you using the magic feather.
You couldn't get to the gym because it's on the second floor and the elevator was out of order.
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Last modified: Sep 29, 2011