direct from . . .
Top Ten Reasons You Weren't Chosen To Be The New Bond Girl
(submitted by The Frunkus Kid)
You thought the ad read "New Bondage Girl Wanted" and showed up in nothing but chains connected to your body piercings.
You have bigger biceps than Bond.
You back-talked Dame Judy Densch.
Your last role was as stand-in for Michael Moore.
You made sexual harassment claims against your last two "00" agents.
People actually believed you could be a nuclear physicist/supermodel, turning the franchise on its head.
Turn ons: Bald men with cats, Men with super strong teeth, and Men who have their own evil lair.
You were Miss Gold Bond girl 2010.
You still aren't sure, but the new stretchy pants and box of twinkie's eased the pain of rejection.
(Batman (no thumbs))
You're a guy and while Hollywood has gone liberal, they're not quite that liberal...YET.
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Last modified: Nov 21, 2011