Stop throwing your fingernail clippings in the Salvation Army bucket.
(Warchild)
Say 9 "Hail Rudolphs" a day, and use only gourmet chocolate chips in Santa's cookies.
(Magus Noan)
Give Rudolph new batteries for his nose.
(Norm Shelton)
Identity theft
(Mute)
"Dear Santa: Please bring me lots of coal this year. But do NOT bring any of those stoopid electronic doohickeys."
(Stephen H)
Help the first old lady you see across the street - whether she wants to go or not.
(whyBother)
Persuade Santa that it was your evil twin that was flirting with Mrs. Claus, not you.
(Tristan)
Hire the elf law firm of Binky, Twinky, Winky and Shapirowitz to file a "naughty injunction" on your behalf in North Pole Circuit Court.
(MLehde)
Threaten to post video from last Christmas of Santa kissing Mommy.
(whyBother)
Offer to sign your #1 Top Ten list entry as "Santa" to help him get some CSITTL cred.
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