Make them sing the national anthem before presenting the food.
(chuck king)
Sit in the no-smoking section and put a big stogey in your mouth, but don't light it
(Aaron Voisine)
Ask for ketchup when dessert arrives.
(Cindy Miller)
Order the soup de jour, then complain there are not enough jours in it.
(beuret)
Ask if the wine is fresh.
(The Manatee)
Ask them to run across the road and get you something cheaper.
(kalman, chuck king)
Use the phrase "al dente" as often as possible, especially when asking for the bill.
(Steve Weiss)
One word: charades
(BW, /\aron)
Tell them the ice cream you ordered is cold.
(Steve Weiss)
Keep beckoning them over and when they arrive ask for more time.
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