The Ground Crew manual is called Airplane Maintenance for Dummies
(Impulse Shopper)
Every meal, on every flight, in every area all over the world: Spam
(Fonz)
During the safety presentation, they apologize if the seats, which act as a floatation device, are not fully dried out yet.
(Bob Clemmons)
They insist on putting identification tags on all of your limbs
(C. Myers)
Two Words: Barrel Rolls
(Doug R)
The pilot says "We've reached our cruising altitude of 30,000 feet, it's a nice day out, so we're going to roll down the windows and put the top down."
(Stormcrow)
A big fat guy has to stand in front of the door to keep the plane from depressurizing
( Vasitor)
No matter where you're going, all flights go through Des Moines, Iowa
(rob)
The duct tape on the wings is a DEAD giveaway
(Nob461, Phil, mcwtlg@gte.net, ttuwhite, Hula Man, Norm Shelton)
An hour into the flight, a guy comes out of the cockpit, hands you a captain's hat, and informs you that it's your turn.
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