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Top Ten Tips for Valentine's Day
To win her heart, turn to the "flannel jammies" page in the Victoria's Secret Catalogue instead.
Surprise your Valentine by waking her up with a kiss from her favorite reptile
Take your honey on adventurous evening of stalking your ex-girlfriend.
Those little cinnamon hearts are great for de-icing a slippery sidewalk
If you receive a card from "Guess Who" you had better guess right.
You might want to cancel that week-long bass fishing trip with your buddies
Reject that invitation to the Jerry Springer Show.
A pizza and pay per view wrestling by candle light does not constitute a romantic date.
When buying chocolates, avoid anything called a "blue fuzz special"
If you're trying to pass off that dried-up fire hazard in your living room as a "Valentine's Tree", it's probably about time you finish taking down your Christmas decorations.
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Last modified: Feb 16, 1998