direct from . . .
Top Ten Signs That You Watch Too Much TV
(submitted by Mabonus@aol.com)
You don't have a clue where your children are, but you sure know where to find Oprah....4:00 every afternoon on Channel 12
(LSUTiger)
You only use Depends because you've never seen a commercial for a toilet.
(Stickboy)
You can only communicate by using commercial slogans and theme show lyrics.
(Sofa Spud)
Your TV is mounted on the floor under the bed with a face-sized hole cut in your mattress.
(Wierd Wanda)
You traded your Viagra pills for a free Premium Channel
(Krass Krangle)
You've learned how to change the channel just by squinting at the cable box a certain way.
(NDB)
Separation anxiety when over six feet away from your TV set.
(Submission Master)
You're trying very hard to get your dog to say "Yo quiero Taco Bell!"
(Reggie)
You broke the off button because the idea of the TV being off frightens you.
(THe ManA)
You have the attention span of a ferret on espresso
(Menace Diller)
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sra
& crs
Last modified: May 31, 1998