direct from . . .

Christian's and Scott's Interactive Top Ten List

Top Ten Signs Your House Won't Appear in Better Homes and Gardens

(submitted by Got Tofu?)

10. You haven't gotten it out of the tree and put the wheels back on it since the April tornado. (Timmin)
9. The controversial "Yard-Junk of the Midwest" issue was unexpectedly vetoed by magazine Big-Wigs. (I am A)
8. They're too full of themselves to recognize the beauty and practicality of a dinette set made entirely from broken toilets. (DAN ze MAN)
7. To improve your garden you removed all the slugs, but, not wanting to kill the poor inocent creatures, you used them as table decorations. (lazyj)
6. You're happy weeds are perennials. (fatnat)
5. You are saving dust on end tables for use as potting soil. (Joe2766)
4. "Then, you turn left onto the dirt road.... Hello? Hello?" (Michael H. Ivester Greenville, SC)
3. Pigeon guano is not considered to be an acceptable substitute for stucco. (Steen Ponak)
2. You haven't gone into the master bedroom since the dust-bunnies started blocking the door. (Yooda Mann)
1. You have an attractive kitchen island, but first you have to cross the "Sea of Dirty Dishes" (JEB)

Christian and Scott thank Chris Mulder from Agoura, CA; the graphics on this page are his creations.
Copyright © 1995-2015, Scott Atwood and Christian Shelton

Scott Atwood and Christian Shelton (hereafter the authors) retain full copyright of all material on this and all other pages of "Christian's & Scott's Interactive Top Ten List." The authors grant to all other parties the sole right to create a link to this page. However, the authors reserve all other rights. No material from these pages may be copied without the express consent of one of the authors.

sra & crs Last modified: Oct 15, 1998